Well once again I am back.
Seems to be the story of my life at the moment...here again...gone again.
Once our daughter came back (after the renovating capers) I found it hard to find time to actually blog. Then two weeks in Malaysia. Have been back a week and have been flat out keeping up with the housework and all those other wifely duties that we all do from day to day.
There have been changes.
There has been a lot of 'off again/on again' DD days and weeks.
We now have The Silence in complete charge of all things. There are no grey areas to cause anymore 'should I or shouldn't I' questions.
This has been a lot easier I think for both of us.
It is his way or no way. Simple as.
Still hard to do things while the daughter remains at home and still have to work out some disciplines can be done without her knowledge. Teenage daughters have the most amazing hearing until it comes time to do the dishes or tidy their room!
So far we have Tuesday and Friday evenings to ourselves so that is a bonus...though sometimes it is hard to have to wait for things to be dealt with over the days that she is home.
Anyway that is about it really..not much to say, other than The Silence is getting good at stepping up and sorting things out. I still have a niggling feeling that this will all go up in smoke at some stage. That comes from previous times of things not being followed through for days.
It is a trust issue. It is an issue that eventually I will have to let go.
Keep smiling, have a spank free day!
Well *ONCE AGAIN* I'm happy you're back! LOL.
ReplyDeleteTrust, there is that word again. It is a deadly ttwd circle that can be created, and hard to break. You need to trust him, so he can lead more confidently, but yet when he 'messes up' ( sorry Silence, thinking of it in her mind) you loose the trust...starting a spiral of negativity, which may cause him to further not lead confidently, thus causing more lack of trust!
Grrrrrrrrr. I suppose we all need to figure out a way to let our hearts feel what our minds know, 'we mess up, how come they can't?'.
Stop worrying about the future, because you'll miss the good of the present ( so I read on some Charlie Brown Facebook thing!)
Big hugs
love Willie
Well hello Willie!
ReplyDeleteTrust is such a delicate thing... I am learning to just take one day at time at the moment. Which is hard for me, as I like to see things ahead.
Maybe I need The Silence to add 'blog and chat' to the daily list just to ensure that I actually get on here!
Hugs back at you Willie
For the journey to be successful you will have to let go. After all, you put him in charge now you have to step back and let him lead. Sounds so simple and yet so difficult. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteHi Sunnygirl
DeleteYou are so right..I do need to step back. It is something in my nature that is quite hard to do, though it is getting easier and easier :) (on some days)
Hi Hez, glad you are back, I know how hard it is to do the waiting thing, but at least the Silence is keeping track. Try not to worry about will he won't he carry on just keep your fingers crossed and be a good girl:)
ReplyDeletelove Jan.xx
Hey English Rose
DeleteThanks for your comment. Yes The Silence is keeping track :) 'A good girl'...well I try :)
Hugs
Trust is a biggie, that's for sure. And I think it's as big for them as it is for us. They need us to trust them and they need to be able to trust us. We need to be able to trust them and we need them to be able to trust us. It's something that takes time, effort, and understanding from both parties. None of us are perfect and each of us will fall short sometimes. It sounds like overall things are going well right now though, so that's great! I totally understand what you're saying about teenage hearing too. Ugh. Good luck with that!
ReplyDeleteHey Grace,
DeleteTrust does work both ways, and I think in some ways that The Silence trusts me more than he should in some areas...
I do need to remember that no one is perfect...except for that perfect teenage hearing!!
Hugs
Welcome back. Trust is so hard. Once earned it has to be maintained. It takes a lot to build up and small niggling things can tear it down.
ReplyDeleteCallie
Hey Callie
DeleteThanks :)
Trust does have to be maintained. It has become such a big issue now with DD/TTWD. Everything is magnified...along with all of our faults :(
So glad to see you again. :) Malaysia, wow. That must have been quite a trip? :) I hope that leaving things all in the Silence's hand brings about the balance that will work for you both, and that you can find ways to keep your rolls in place, even while your daughter is around. {{{HUGS}}} And I'm all for the Silence putting blogging on your list. ;) Just saying. :)
ReplyDeleteHey Es May!
DeleteYep Malaysia was great! On business though, so not much sight seeing went on.
It is working a lot better now that he is in charge completely...though I do have to admit tonight to spending money that I had not asked to spend...drat :(
No more grey areas has helped a lot over the last week when this way was implemented.
Maybe I should suggest to The Silence that blogging should be on the list of extra chores :)
Lots of hugs!