Um..Yes...Ok...

So The Silence and I had a chat after the last post I did..and we chatted again the next day. Things have been getting back to 'normal' since..slowly but surely.

There was one stage on the weekend that I spat the dummy, became a bratty prat and ended up with more spanks than I care to count... That was because I told him that this was all stupid and we were not doing it anymore....funny, I seem to feel this way pre that time of the month.

Tonight, since I was feeling better..sigh..being better is not always a good thing you know...as the Sassy Sassy came all out after being locked away for the last three weeks behind a wall of virus's.

The Sassy Sassy wanted FREEDOM! Resistance is futile!!!

So, being the nice person I am...I let Sassy Sassy out to have free reign.

Yeah, I know..dumb idea.

So while over the bed listening to The Silence being not so silent for a change, I realised how silly some of the things are that are said during 'that moment', things like...

We do not hit in this house...Um..Yes..Ok, and you are saying this while walloping my butt?
(By the way, the hit on my part was in fun..ish. Well it started as fun, then got a little out of hand when he spanked to high)

How about this one...

You do not say 'shut up'  now shut up and listen to me...(also said while OTB)

There are others, I just cannot remember them all now. It has been a long night and Sassy Sassy has not helped at all, even though I gave it free reign for a short time.

So, I am in a fighting mood, not at all feeling submissive, not quite in the right frame of mind at all. The Silence has been trying to help me back to that place of submissive/obedience that I was in before I got sick three weeks ago.

Such a long time for things to be let go and be lenient. I understand the reasoning of why he did, and for that I am grateful. I am really.

But now, through no fault of his or mine, I am finding it hard to get back to being the quiet, respectful, non sassy, submissive, obedient person that we all know that I can be....We do all know that don't we? I am not still in an antibiotic haze here am I?
I was once that person..wasn't I?

Um..Yes..Ok...maybe not quite the angelic person I would like to make out to be.

Darn...my brain just wont kick into that role, and the rear is starting to get a permanent rosy glow on it that has nothing to do with brilliant sunshine.

I know it is a head space thing...I have to get there in my own head.

Feeling better today, so all that pent up energy and Sassy Sassy has wanted to be let out. I now have to learn to control it all over again.

It will happen, I just have to remember each morning that today is a new day to make mistakes in to make a new start and re train the mindset.

I am going to have to start exercising again...  (but not these ones)

I do hope that you have a great day today, and that it is spank free :)