Thursday, 14 February 2013

I Think I am Back :) Perhaps

This is an attempt at getting a decent post out in between coughing fits that I am sure are going to bend my ribs the wrong way around eventually.

I would also like to apologise that I am soooo out of the loop on your own blogs :( I havee 143 emails about blogs in the last week, and no way am I going to be able to catch up on them all. I really am sorry, as what you write and post I love to read and support, but with being sick I just have not been able to even get my brain around getting to here over the last two weeks other than the few short posts I have done.

Being sick has been no picnic. In my last post I mentioned about losing what control I do have in the house. That was when I just had the flu. It is now day 14 of still being under the weather.

On Friday of last week I was starting to feel a bit better and decided that we could go ahead with the 'Boss/submission weekend'...well...we did Friday night..sort off.

Saturday morning I woke up feeling ill and spent the rest of the day either in bed or my head in a bucket, perched on the toilet seat...I had picked up, from goodness knows where since I had been home all week with the flu...a gastro virus. Not good when you are already fighting a flu virus.

Control...oh, what I thought I had lost while I had the flu was nothing compared to the next few days...I had no control at all, not even over my own body.

The Silence at one stage had to help dry me after a shower, help me into bed, and help me at times from room to room, as nothing would actually stay in its own place, including walls that had a habit of jumping out at me at the most in appropriate moments, and that is when my befuddled brain realised that in this situation I was nothing but a puppet on a string, and that he was in control of everything...the house, me, shopping, me, cooking, me, laundry, me...

He has been such a big help with me being sick and at times an emotional mess. I am never an emotional mess, but I guess this time round there was no fight left in me. No walls were standing.

I would like to point out here that he now owes me a treat...I have made it through a whole week without a spanking..well, a little over a week (though I think I might be pushing the boundaries a bit since starting to feel a bit better).
This of course has nothing to do with finally being submissive and obedient. This is entirely by chance, because with being sick I had no resistance to being sent to bed to rest or told to go and sit down, or whatever else he happened to say as a directive. Nor did I have the energy to be sassy...

But all that seems to be making a reappearance since yesterday afternoon. I must be getting better, because the tongue is loosening up and starting to flap on its own again.

So The Silence now owes me:

$24.00 from Boot Camp (by the way, he is writing his own post on this, just taking his time)

A treat of some sort for both of us getting through Boot Camp (yes, it has been weeks)

A coffee out together (cannot remember what for now)

And a treat for just having a week free of spanking (ok, I was sick, but that doesn't count, it was still a week free)

So, in reality I have not really 'chased, caught and claimed' that dangling carrot on my own...The Virus's have helped immensely. Kudos to them for that..but for nothing else.

I can see things going back to 'normal' sometime in the next few days. Having the psychosomatic butt tingling thinking about it, because I know that it is coming. I cannot deny the fact that I feel he has itchy hands from lack of use.

That and the fact that I am still feeling sick, making it Day 14. So over it.
I can feel the walls rising along with the frustration of still being this way. I can feel the 'I want to break out' emotion rising its head.

I guess that is what Cabin Fever is...I have seen no one, nor left the house for 14 do you people do it, who get snowed in?

I am even at the point of 'Rules be damned'  I just don't care.

My current state of mind is not good. Everything is balanced precariously on that word: meh

The Silence has been lenient with things, as I have been ill. But I guess there is day a reckoning coming. I am so tired and have no energy...except in my tongue it seems.

Oh well, I guess that eventually I will feel normal again. The Silence will expect the rules to be obeyed and the leniency will be laid aside.

Hugs to all and may your day be spank free and that carrot that dangles makes it closer to your reach :)


  1. Hey if there is no fine print in the 'contract' a spank free week is a spank free week!

    Hopefully you get to enjoy life soon!

    We miss you but understand..Start answering NEW posts when you feel ready!
    Love Ya

    1. Yes you are right Willie...a spank free week is a spank free week :)

      I have not had a nap today like I was supposed to..ended up doing just a little amount of racing to get things done and the laptop turned off before he makes it home in 20 mins....Not to sure about the 'rules be damned' thing right now...could be because the mind is starting to get a little more thought into it!

      Hugs love ya

  2. Hi Hez

    First of all I'm glad you feeling better, but don't over do it, you need to get your energy back and still need rest. Ok mummy missy has said her bit lol

    Second, way to go, you has a karrot yey, as willie said there is no fine print saying how to get a spank free week :) you made it, so you deserve it.

    Keep that tongue under control, and enjoy what ever you have coming as a treat :)

    Glad to have you back, don't worry about the missed posts, dramas come and go, and Iif ou missed one, there is sure another shortly to come lol

    Take care do yourself x

    1. Hey Mummy Missy :) (lol)

      Yes I have a carrot...just wondering when the carrot is going to be you see, the Hoh is not that good on following through with it! Might just end up with one out of the fridge!!

      Didn't keep the tongue under control...and ended up OTB tonight for a 'Re-adjustment'

      Glad to be back! :) Still not quite right but getting there :)

      Hugs xx

  3. $24, two treats and a coffee date? You're doing good! :)
    Seriously, I hope you're feeling better very soon.

    1. Hey MrBB,

      That is a pile up of 'treats' :) At the rate we get to go out it should be a longer list by Christmas!!

      Thanks, I hope I am feeling better soon too!

  4. Sickness upon sickness, that's unfair.
    Those viruses should be paddled.
    I suppose The Silence will have to do a bit of reckoning and paying up in several ways.

    1. Hi Bas :)

      Not sure what was going on with all the sickness..

      I agree they should be paddled, and The Silence agreed tonight to that they should be with a little 're-adjustment' time....

      Now if he would just pay up on the treats... :)

  5. Hez, you just worry about getting better. NO actually, no worrying allowed. You rest and rest some more. When you are better you may have a bit of a time finding those submissive buttons but that's not important right now. Listen to your man as he takes care of you and get well okay!?

    1. Getting there...Have way lost the submissive buttons! Might be under all the tissues...and yes I will get rest and get well :)


  6. Yuck! I hope you get back to 100% soon! I hate that :(

    1. Hi Elle :)

      Getting there slowly...taking such a long time!! But at least The Silence has had nearly 100% of that time...a submissive wife..just not now...can't seem to find it...

      Hugs :)