'How do you think today went?' He asks as my back is to him laying in bed.
(The Silences normal end of the day question that I hate, as we always seem to see things differently....I see it as great and he sees it as something...well...different...purposely as he might, just might, be able to be persuaded otherwise)
'I think today went well' (please, please, please can we not have this conversation)
'Yep, I hardly talked to you, so didn't get into trouble there' (yeah, there was a reason for that)
'You did a lot of swearing today' (Yes, dear...but only little swear words)
'I did? oh...well I will try harder tomorrow'
'Come on where?' (as if I don't already know :( )
'You have been out of sorts all day. Maybe I should of caught this earlier, but you are not yourself. Now come on'
'But I am myself...come back to bed'
(Darn, I can hear him get up and rattle in the 'implement' draw. So I close my eyes and hope for the best 'pretending you are asleep' show ever)
(Obviously my acting skills still need some polish if I cannot do a 'pretending you are asleep' show successfully)
'But I am fine, I am just tired. Do we really, real......ly have to do this tonight? Can't we just go back to bed and go to sleep. Come on, (as I pat his side of the bed) come to bed...you are tired...very tired....you don't want to be doing this tonight.
And I am all good...seeeee.....(as I smile into his face which worked about as well as pretending to be asleep did)
'No, you are not all right. What was wrong today?'
'I was just...I don't know...grumpy. Pms'ing or something. But I am all good now' (Which I wasn't, and not to sure if I am now either the next morning)
'Right. Pants down'
'How about you drop yours and lean over the bed, and I spank you?'
'Oh alright' (so I pull his down instead...honestly, I thought that was what the NOW was for...actually no, I was delaying)
The Silence just stands there, shorts around his knees...he is not moving at all. No Siree, there is no smile, no movement. Maybe, just maybe I have pushed the line a bit too far?
'I am going to count to three, and you had better have your pants down and off and be over the bed'
'You are counting to fast!'
(pants are at least down at this stage, but still getting to the OTB position)
'No, no,no WAIT! You counted to fast. I am getting there. Hang on'
'No, you get there now. I did not count too fast at all'
'I am not bending over there now. You are going to swat me with that thing before I get into position'
'No I wont'
'Go over there then so you can't reach. Are you sure you want to do this now? We could do this tomorrow instead?'
'Get over the bed ...NOW!'
So that was how last night ended. I went to bed with a glowing bottom. Yesterday was not a good day. Today, will be better. . . so long as I can get out of this mood I am in. I am fighting it, but it is like a loosing battle. Like I am in a fog or something. Sounds silly I know, and should be easy enough to drop the 'moody attitude' I mean..it is my attitude/mood...so therefore I should be able to change it.
Well, we shall see how today goes. Maybe we just need to lock up the house and go out for the day....yeah, maybe not....