Tuesday, 15 January 2013

Suggestions and Advice :)

Ok, so this is going to be a funny post...not funny hahaha, but funny as in, well, I don't know...not your average post I guess.

As the title suggests, we are after some suggestions and advice. By the way, it would be in my best interest, or rather that of my rear if I did not 'have' to blog this post.

I know some of you are probably going to not agree with what I am asking, and that is ok. Everyone does ttwd/dd differently. I don't hold it against you :) But you might still have some valuable advice or suggestions too :)

But if you are a spanker, or rather find yourself OTK or OTB then this post is aimed at you :)

If you are not, then by all means feel free to read on. It is on the suggestion of The Silence that I ask......sigh.

(You know he has his own blog now...he could of asked you himself. )

Right-t-o, first off, here are some photos of our current arsenal implements:

These are the homemade loopys

                  And these are store bought items
                                                                       That shoe horn...ouch!

These are the homemade paddles, olive canes, and the infamous Mr Glue!

Mr Glue (for Malcolm) 16 inches long, two glue sticks glued together, then heat shrink wrapped over that
This is mean, mean, mean and is only used in the utmost, absolutely utmost circumstances 
(thank goodness that I am such an Angel...cough cough)

Moving along now to the question that we need suggestions and advice on, and the reason why I have posted the photos.

(By the way, why is Turkey called Turkey when Turkey does not come from Turkey?)

And that is what happens constantly in our house...way off subject...everytime. We call them 'squirrel moments'

(Don't worry about the answer to that question as The Silence has just looked it up. The answer is this...Turkey used to be called Turkestan, which is a Persian term meaning 'abode of Turks..a place where the Turks live)

Anyhoo, I am avoiding the issue here...

After a spanking should you feel a 'reminder' on rear? For a half hour, hour or a few hours? And if so....What implement does your Hoh use that gives you that reminder?

And here is the reason why those questions have been asked.....

As you can see by the photos, we have an assortment (though most homemade ) of implements. Most hurt like the dickens for an extremely short time. And I mean an extremely short time. By the time the next one bites the first bite is a forgotten memory.

And here is my problem. I want to be reminded for awhile afterwards that I have had a spanking. Have it there to remind me of the reason why I was OTB/OTK in the first place.

Is this normal?

I have what The Silence calls a cast iron butt....only because I have broken a few, ok more than a few, implements.

Is there anything that will actually 'last' ?

If I have to go through a spanking for something then I would rather it be worth the effort of being OTB/OTK.

I know, it sounds weird...maybe I am weird, But honestly,there is no pain other than the actual spanking, there is nothing afterwards, by the time I have given the last count, it is like I have not even had a spanking, my bottom only goes a slight pink. Sometimes I have been reduced to tears (and had that release) and that has been because of the sting of the paddles one after an another. And only then in the most extreme times. 

I know this is a weird post...maybe I am just weird and abnormal?

Is there anyone the same? Suggestions? Advice?

The Silence also is at a loss, as he would like me to be 'reminded' too for a while afterwards. Instead of me just getting sassy afterwards.

PS. I would like to point out here, that the issue is the afterwards...not the during. As some of those implements hurt like hell!


  1. If that top item in the 2nd picture is a cricket bat......... I have no idea what to tell you. That thing kills! It bruises and stings for hours after.

    Sorry :( I'm not much help.


    1. Hi Callie

      It did the first time we used it too! The bruises lasted for days! and it hurt to sit. But not now....

      Thanks for commenting though :) And any comments are appreciated as I don't know why it is not 'effective' anymore, other than perhaps The Silence is a little more gently using it...don't know. It was put away for a long time after its first use, cannot remember why it came out again. He used it now as a warm up :)

    2. Maybe you are just 'used' to them.......... I don't wanna say it but maybe the intensity needs to be turned up. I would suggest the longer pain will only come from heavier implements though. :(

    3. Hmmm, I think you could be right on that one. Sheesh, that is not good getting used to things so quickly!!!

  2. Hi M3
    Well let me first tell you " I don't think you are a freak"
    As much as I hate being spanked I like to remember the pain after so it's reminds me to be good.
    Now we have a few selection of things our selves and you are right, the ones that sting the most are the ones you don't feel afterwards.
    It has to do with surface pain and deep muscle pain.
    When I get that horrid, absolutely mean cane / crop I am close to screaming and after wards it still stings for a few minutes but then it goes and as if nothing had happened. But I do bruise a little bit from the tip of that evil thing as its very flexible and the tip really digs in.
    What really keeps the pain for a couple of days is his belt. That stings but it really goes deep. No evidence of spanking to see the next day but does it hurt to sit? Yes omg it does.
    If I get the belt I can feel the actual pain and sting for hours afterwards. I have that empty feeling in my stomach for hours and it hurts and stings to sit. However the sting does go after about 3/4 hours but the pain doesn't.
    I also find changing implements through the spanking changes things as it can't go numb.
    For severe things he uses his had, then the ruler, then the bath brush ( this is a short handled but extremely sturdy and thick solid wood version) omg ouch and then he changes to his belt or the dreaded cane. But the belt is the one I feel the next day.
    I would advise caution though with belt. First it should be leather only as otherwise not much effect. But the leather should be a softer more flexible type with nice rounded edges, and it should be doubled over. Otherwise it could cut the skin and/ or wrap and hit the sides of your hip.
    Sorry for the long post hope it helps though :)

    1. Hi Mustbecrazy

      Thanks for replying :) Glad I am not the only one then! We do have a belt, a leather one but it is quite stiff and not flexible much at all. So I guess The Silence will have to hunt up another one! He did read your reply and found it very interesting...with lots of ...hmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmm's in there while he was reading it. Wondering now what he is planning!

      He does change the implements too throughout the spanking. I have heard lots about the bath brush, but we don't own one. Cannot find one that is wooden, or can but they usually have raised patterns on them. Still looking as maybe one day we will find one :)

      Once again, thank you for your very valuable information, it has been very helpful :)

    2. First of all I hope this only comes up once :)
      I had to laugh and read through my post again. I wonder what his hmmmmmm's are for lol
      Hope it's not too evil.
      About the bath brush, hubs bought it from one of those natural health cosmetic stores. I don't know where you live but most countries have such shops, maybe you could try there, but I always say careful what you wish for ;)

    3. I think he is going 'shopping' today :( and no doubt will be reading all this before he goes!

  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    1. Deleted as a repeat post not because of what it said...same with the following :)

  4. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  5. Sorry dont know what happened there, stupid phone, do delete my repeated posts lol

  6. lol Mustbecrazy,
    I will do that for you :)

  7. Well...I am the COMPLETE opposite to you. I don't find the spanking 'that' bad...I mean yeah they sting or what not. AFTERWARDS though...well it runs deep. Barney switches around implements too, trying to keep my head in the game, as I seem to concentrate, process, and deal with the pain of the spanking. Switching the implements does help. My spankings are LONG.

    Because I bruise, a wise woman suggested we use a thin paddle ( oh FYI that wooden spatula thing you have there, the triangular head one- we own it...I'll tell you later about it and our TURKEY actually-lol) As we didn't have one, Barney used the ping pong paddle-for now. It did sting, but left no bruising or deep down feeling. Your rambling point Willie? I think the implement has to be thick and solid. That blasted silicone spatula ( spreader) I always talk about does both. Hurts like the dickens during, and for a good 24 hours later, when going to sit, or wear jeans.

    Okay I have decided. It is official we are completely 'Mad'

    Your Pain Enabler

    1. http://www.chalet.net.au/product/288/silicone-spreader-fluro-pink

      In case anyone is interested.

    2. hmmmm, I think he will like the silicone spreader....very pretty :)

      I don't bruise easily so that is good, at least not on the rear. Cannot even manage to get it to go rosy red. Just a slight pink colour, and it has been that way since the start. Though I did notice the other day that he was looking afterwards and said 'hmmm, that is a nice glowing colour' This has me worried...LOL

    3. Dear Pain Enabler

      Yes, I think we are completely 'MAD'

      Love the one who will I think today be experiencing the Silicone Spreader

      (not because I need it though...just as a trial run....)

  8. Bah M3, I'm not sure! I know that MM can use leather for a good long time and the sting goes away quickly afterwards. I'll go to sleep with a warm but not painful butt. When he used a fairly thin wood paddle, the sting sticks with me for a while. A thicker wooden paddle that is fairly small will be there the next day, but that takes a pretty serious walloping.

    We are all so different. It does sound like your bottom has gotten quite used to spankings. I'd suggest trying a spanking that starts quite stingy with something very light and extra annoying and then perhaps ends with one of the heavier implements that goes deep and maybe would give you some leftover feelings.

    The one thing I know is that for me it's easy to get "numb-bum" with the heavier implements. You stop feeling it after a while. Therefore my MM sticks with stingier things so I don't check out on him. That doesn't solve your after-problem though.

    I hope somebody has some ideas for you!

    1. So here is what I have noticed...keep in mind I'm a bruiser..and not in the fighting sense. First off Susie is right in her descriptions

      B starts Hand, belt, something stingie, then thuddy, then back to hand...the hand ends up really hurting much more after the implement Olympics back there.

    2. Hi Susie

      Thank you for your comment :)

      I don't usually get numb bum either. Starting with the stingy and ending with the heavier ones sounds like a good idea and we will certainly give that a try :)

      Hey Wilma

      The Silence sometimes uses his hand, but has not yet got the 'flick' right and quite often just feels like a dull thud :( Not really effective at all most times. It often leaves me thinking pfft is that all you have. I know, not a good attitude to have, but his hand gets sore long before my bottom does!

      Hugs to you both

    3. Oh no I get it with the hand and the pfft? It is a warm up to start...but AFTER everything else...the hand can have an entirely different feel...

  9. You're not weird or abnormal (or maybe we both are.) We use different implements also and even though they make marks and turn my bottom "cherry red" it fades very quickly. I will feel a nice warm glow for a while afterwards that is actually quite pleasant, but no bruising. The only implement that has left a lasting feeling sting afterwards has been the cane and that has been very mild and shortlived also, but the cane is new for us & he is just learning how to use it. Sorry I couldn't be more help.

    1. Morning Mrs.D :)

      Hmmmmm.....yes, The Silence has been thinking about a cane for quite awhile. He seems to have gone from a man who disliked implements to a man that is getting joy out of making wooden paddles and thinking of other implements to use.

      It is the one thing that scares me!!! Even though we have made 'canes' from a Olive tree, the real deal is quite scary indeed. We will have to see what happens with the one he is intending to buy today...that and a Silicone thingy from Wilma's suggestion....I knew this was going to be a bad post, even though I do want that 'reminder' afterwards :)

      Thank you for commenting :) and for your helpful commenting on letting me know that I am not weird or abnormal and that there are others out there that are the same :)


  10. Sounds like you have developed "leather butt", since you say that at first this problem of not feeling it afterwards wasn't an issue. Much as you won't like this suggestion, I will say it anyways: Fewer spankings. This might let your bottom become more sensitized again.

    1. Hi Sereena

      Thank you for commenting. It was only ever the cricket bat that lasted a few days and was right at the start when we used it. Did not understand about good warm ups back then.
      I have also been three weeks without a spanking, and still no change in what colour or how much I feel afterwards. It is like a pain barrier goes up I guess. No idea.
      I did also think about the 'leather butt' over the last few days too and did wonder the same thing. But, ahem...it is still soft and pliable :) I can still feel the actual spanking, as I did at the start. But only once or twice since we started back in October last year have any spankings actually left a reminder for more than a few minutes. So this is not new, which I guess I should of said in my post.

      Thank you for your comment, and it is something that we will examine (so to speak) and discuss.

      Thank you once again for your valuable suggestion and advice :)

  11. Can't help. I never feel it beyond the initial stinging. I color fast and have even had a bruise or two occasionally but nothing beyond the spanking.

    1. Hi Sunnygirl,

      So you are like me then? Do you find that you want a reminder? I don't even colour to much. Have felt a 'glow' for a little while, like a few minutes, and have been that way since the start of ttwd/dd.

      Thank you for your comment :)

  12. I just want to say THANK YOU!!!! My husband and I have been talking about this for a week or two, I feel the sting during the spanking, and actually for about a minute afterwards, but barely, and then, NOTHING. I have been researching my butt off, no pun intended, ;) and have been able to find nothing really to say how a spanking should go so that the wife remembers it. Now I can take a few of the posts you got and get my husband to read along. I do fear the next spanking after he reads the comments, but I know it is needed. Your post is so appropriately timed in my world. Thank you.

  13. Hi Es May,

    You are very welcome :) Glad that the post helped someone and that once again I am not the only one!

    I too have done research on the how, what, where's and whys to no avail.

    I know that there are different levels/intensity and have done all that stuff, and still no 'lasting' affect.

    Good luck to you and your search. If you do find anything useful can you please pass it on?

    Thanking you :)

    1. I totally will. :) We have had only a couple implements so far, we're fairly new to DD, but when I saw your loopy's, I made one right away! I have three skipping ropes, and actually find the plastic one the hardest to use, so never use it... but I found a use for it now! My husband is excited to give it a go next time... now I wonder what I got myself into!..... *gulp* Might have to make a mistake and take it back apart. LOL As if I'd get away with it now that he's seen it.

    2. Oh Es May

      You WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Oh my gosh, did I fail to post that those, not so much the white one, sting like the dickens? The grey one is the worse depending on how hard the swing is. That is made out of multi strand cable..or cat 5 network cable.

      And you have SHOWN it to your husband already? Oh my gosh, oh my GOSH!

      Well, I have heard other people say that they are awful, and others say...meh.

      So, I am hoping that you, regardless about wanting new implements are on the meh side.

      Good luck and hugs!

    3. Um, lol... yeah, I showed him.... guess I should have thought that through better. It actually ended up being good, he used it last night, and it actually left a sting for five minutes. He only did 10 real swats with it, but I think next time I'll feel the sting for longer because I told him he should use it longer. We'll see how it goes, but I too want something that will sting for a while after so that I'm being reminded to keep being submissive. I don't want the spanking... but I do realize I need help getting more submissive... and spankings are helping.

    4. That is good that it worked for you! I am the same, I don't want the spanking, but do want a reminder for a wee while. I too need the help in remembering to be submissive and the as you say the spankings do help :)

  14. Hez, thank you for the info about the glue stick. I must make one.

    With regard to marking, reminders etc. I have found a cane the best. Longer lasting marks and lasting discomfort are produced by dragging the cane in the direction of its length, exactly at the moment of hard impact. It takes practice and only happens when the stroke is hard enough. Because the cane is at that moment pressing very hard against the skin, dragging it will abrade the skin and cause a graze, in addition to the broken capillaries which are caused by sudden local stretching along each side of the cane's strike area (that's why cane strokes produce double lines.)

    This technique requires that there be a space beyond the spankee, e.g. if the spanker is right handed, there must be enough free space on the spankee's left for the stroke to be continued past the spankee without hitting any obstruction, as though the spanker was trying to cut the victim in half. The cane being flexible will bounce and continue to fly freely past its target. The technique can produce marks which take a very long time to fade and may cause bleeding especially if one stroke lands right on top of another. Is this what you want? (!!)

    Soaking the business half of the cane in water for a couple hours is recommended, this makes the cane more flexible, somewhat heavier, helps to prevent breaking and intensifies the pain.

  15. Hi Malcolm,

    um....OUCH! Not quite what I was asking, just need to have a reminder for an hour or so. It is frustrating? having a spanking that you get up from and think...meh. Nor does it really help anything sink in. Maybe I am just a slow learner...

    thank you for commenting.